Claudia Malibu Interview by

Claudia Malibu is a wonderfully refreshing and rather obscure little pop band with fantastic tunes. This e-mail interview took place not long after the release of their Star album. Considering how many artists are trying way too hard to be really weird or to be really original...the band's simple, direct, and sincere music is a refreshing blast of cool air. The four members of the band opted to answer each question in this interview individually.

This is one of five e-mail interviews that were conducted simultaneously in August 2004. Compare the answers from the folks in Claudia Malibu with responses provided by four other fantastic artists to the exact same questions:

Butterfly Boucher * Matt Duss (Fey Ray) * Troy Gregory * Elizabeth Sharp (Ill Ease)

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Name: Luke "Captain" Cavagnac (CC)
Age: 31
Birthplace: Northampton, MA
Outside occupation(s): Artist (painter), bookstore clerk (at least fpr today).

Name: Les LaBarge (LL)
Age: 37
Birthplace: Northampton, MA
Outside occupation(s): Bicyclist, slipper maker.

Name: Jeremy "Worm" Marusek (WW)
Age: 30
Birthplace: Northampton, MA
Outside occupation(s): CEO, secretary.

Name: Adrian Araujo (AA)
Age: 20
Birthplace: Northampton, MA
Outside occupation(s): Frying Bacon and putting Chips Ahoy! on supermarket shelves.

Web site:

The Interview

How do you make decisions?

CC: I'm a dictator but capricious, bossy but indecisive...I don't really know.

LL: I blink, stammer, and cry until the information is released.

WW: Impulse

AA: With a hammer.

CM (this is a group answer): Actually, we sit around Luke's house eating Primo (pizza) and making fun of everyone else and their bands.

If you could change something, what would it be?

CC: The 5-day working week into 3 days.

LL: The size of my nose and teeth.

WW: Our band's popularity.

AA: My hair-do.

CM (group answer): Worm's lack of groupies and the lousy amount of drinks allotted to Luke and Les!

Do you prefer buying things new or used? Explain.

CC: Used because older stuff is often better stuff, especially goes for cars. Only an idiot would buy a brand new car. (Except Worm--he bought a new car but I wouldn't call him an idiot because he might read this answer.)

LL: We bought a cheap new PA that sucks! But our old instruments are great. We would like a new van please!

WW: Most things used because older things are generally better. Most new things are garbage.

AA: Used. You get the same thing for so much less money.

What draws you to a person and what makes you want to stay away?

AA: Powerful magnets.

LL: People that listen are cool. What draws me to a person is when a person who's never heard you before (Kim from Cinci) drives 6 hours to see you because he thinks you're from Maryland and then sits in on nearly three-quarters of your set playing sax in Dayton, Ohio. What makes me wanna stay away is being told by a soundman in Dayton, Ohio about a sexy night of dry-humping on a dance floor and receiving a scab on his member.

WW: People that constantly talk put you to sleep.

CC: I'm drawn to those people who seem more intelligent, better looking, or talented than I am. I'm repelled and disgusted by people who think they are more intelligent, attractive, or talented than me.

What is the world about?

CC: It's all who you know.

AA: $ + ==>`O`

WW: Unfortunately making money but I'd like to think love.

LL: The newest Claudia Malibu record. Gas Money. More than 10 people at shows. Our roadie Jer. Groupies for Jer & worm.

Do you think that your friends have good common sense? Explain.

AA: What are friends?

CC: They drive drunk and get tattoos and use credit cards, but at least they don't get sex change operations that they then change their minds about.

LL: Our friends are not common!

WW: Nobody f*cks up too bad.

Is cooking soothing and relaxing or is it an irritating waste of time? Explain.

AA: Neither, I make my living at it.

CC: I prefer restaurants--except for roasting marshmallows.

WW: I wish I did it more often but I'm lazy.

CM: We like Primo Pizzeria because we have a calzone named after the band there. It's called the Malibu Les Zone. Sometimes we barbecue.

Is consciousness best altered or unaltered? Explain.

AA: McGruff the Crime Dog says don't do drugs and take a bite out of crime!

CC: Sleep deprivation, starvation, brainwashing, and torture--I'd prefer myself unaltered by these things. But dreams are great. Drugs can be fun, of course.

LL: Slightly altered but not to the point where you think Tin Foil Hat is the greatest band ever! (CM agrees)

WW: Unaltered. Because.

What makes things important?

CC: It's all relative. Elvis is important to me because we have the same birthday, but he never meant shit to Public Enemy.

AA: Delusions.

WW: Value.

CM: We have a heightened sense of self-importance.

Are people becoming more intelligent or less intelligent? Explain.

AA: I think it fluctuates like the economy. I think America's been having a great recession of intelligence since the mid to late 90's.

CC: Money grubbing selfish assholes are not intelligent--but there are a lot of them.

WW: The computers do too much thinking for us.

CM: We are money grubbing selfish assholes so whaddaweecare?

What are you certain of?

AA: Not much, I guess.

CC: The Claudia Malibu are the best rock and roll band in the world today.

WW: These questions suck!

CM: This interview will certainly make us famous.

Do you know the difference between wrong and right? Explain.

WW: Sometimes wrong seems right.

CM: F*ck yeah, right!

CC: Adultery is wrong. Shoplifting at Walmart is right.

AA: Yes?

What would you do with a baby if you did not want it?

WW: Sell it on eBay.

AA: Eat it, of course.

CC: Trade it up.

CM: You should always call the police.

Is communication important? Why or why not?

AA: Let me just finish eating this baby arm that's in my mouth.

CC: This question deserves a good answer. Real communication between people is fundamentally important for a full and satisfying existence. I think life must have been better before the telephone because people couldn't get in touch so easily and it meant more when they did. But I guess I'll never know about that.

WW: Yes, otherwise Verizon doesn't get my $70/month.

CM: YES. Rock & Roll is the best form for us.

How can you tell if something is close or far away?

WW: I have eyes.

AA: With a hammer.

CC: When you are too close or too far away you can't see anything properly--so you can never really tell can you?

If you injured or killed an animal or a person while driving and you knew with absolute certainty that no one would ever know that you did it, would you stop or just keep going? Explain.

AA: If it was an animal I would feel bad and keep driving. If it was a person I would make sure they were dead or unconscious and then keep driving.

CC: I ran something over once. No one knows. I'm sure of it.

WW: Animal = Oops! Person = Sorry.

CM: We only injure other bands.

How are plants and animals different?

AA: Plants have a penis and animals have a vagina.

CC: The Animals were a bluesy British Invasion band from Newcastle. The Plants I don't know. Good name though.

WW: Plants don't bleed.

Would you rather be remembered or forgotten? Explain.

AA: I would rather be remembered by the whole universe forever or have my memory utterly destroyed in the maelstrom of time without end or meaning.

CC: Boy that was a silly answer from Adrian. How about being re-membered?

WW: Remembered.

How do you explain things?

WW: Not very well.

AA: With a hammer.

CC: Life is mysterious and wonderful--I like to explain things by questioning our modes of explanation. It's the same as answering a question with a question, wouldn't you say?

Do you know what you are doing? Explain.

WW: Right now no.

AA: Signing my soul to the devil? If that's the case, I better get a Ferrari outta this.

CC: YES. I am living life as fully as I know how. I just wanna be loved.

CM: I am The Claudia Malibu. I always know what we are doing. We are Rocking and Rolling. Gotta go practice now so stop asking us questions. Thank You. Bye-bye.

©2004 LMNOP

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