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April 2019 Article by


How To Find Happiness

All people have something in common. Do you know what that something is? It is very basic and simple. Everyone wants to be happy. And yet that seems odd because very few people ever seem to be truly happy in their lives. Are we all somehow predestined to be anxious and depressed? Or are we all just misplaced souls wandering along aimlessly in the universe without a clue? Possibly could just be that the average person doesn't know who they really are and what they really want in life.


In order to be happy, the first thing one must know is who one is. Do you know who you is? Have you ever thought about whatever it is that makes you who you is? There is a lot of people in every one of us. So many people that it makes almost everyone confused because of all the confusion involved. Find a mirror. Look into the mirror and observe yourself very closely. You don't like what you see, and there's a reason for that. Buried deep inside each of our souls is the innate grief and despair that result from the realization that we are all frighteningly similar to one another.

Study your eyes as you gaze at your image. The reason your pupils are black is because there is nothing there. We all want to feel as if we are uniquely deep and complex. But in reality, we are very simple and generic and there is very little going on inside our minds. It is necessary to understand this most basic concept in order to move forward. So keep staring into the mirror until you get it. If you don't get it at first, try again in an hour or so. If you still don't get it, you may need to generate appropriate punishment in order to achieve the desired outcome.


People don't learn unless they are punished. This is a basic rule of humanity that has existed for millions of years. When the very first apes began to evolve thousands of years ago, they found that the only way they could become smarter and live longer was by subjecting themselves to punishment. This is how the first form of intelligence was created out of nowhere. The story goes like this. One day a large ape took a great big stick and smashed it into his head. He fainted, but as he regained consciousness he noticed that he was somehow touch. So he hit himself again, only this time much harder. His eyes began to shine with the knowledge of knowing more. So he kept hitting himself in the head until his life started to improve. It wasn't long before others followed in his footsteps. This is now known as the beginning of civilization.

If you fail to see what you should see when you look in a mirror, you can do the same thing that the earliest human monkeys did long ago. Take a large object and hit yourself over the head. Don't worry if it doesn't work at first, it may take several attempts. But if you keep the process going long enough, you will eventually gain all of the knowledge you were always meant to gain. There are other forms of punishment that can also be beneficial. Some people find that they can move forward by breaking their arms or legs. Others find that removing their own teeth without anesthesia can provide the stimulus that is needed.


Now that you can see yourself as you really are, an image begins to form in your mind. When you see yourself, you see a human being that is lost and alone in the universe. What you are looking at is a pathetic creature who thinks it knows so much and reality it knows almost nothing. Your ability to focus on your depressing existence helps in achieving happiness. In order to know joy you must first know pain and suffering. All things come from other things. And there is nothing that cannot be done without first finding a way of understanding what can and cannot happen.

Do you like things to happen? Or would you rather nothing happen, ever? Are you the kind of person who looks at what things can be? Or are you the kind of person who looks at what is wrong with everything and everyone?


In order to find happy, you must first know what happy is. What you may not realize is that happy is already all around you all the time. From the moment you were born, there were rings upon rings of large happy surrounding your body. But because they were invisible, you had no idea they were there. And all you could do was be miserable and beg for milk. You did not realize it at the time, but you were the main reason why your parents became unhappy. Before you were born, your mother and father lived in wonderful bliss. But then you came along and everything changed. When you were only a few months old, you finally began to realize how miserable you made your parents. The guilt that was associated with this realization made you begin to despise yourself. As months passed by, you began to feel as if you were the cause of all the world's problems. And, in a way, you were. Your birth not only messed up your parents' lives, but also the lives of millions of other people all around the globe. And yet all the while happy was right there around you, clustered in invisible rings.


Them rings is weird things. They can be big rings or small rings, but they're always rings. And for most people, they remain completely invisible. To be able to locate specific happy, you need to make the rings visible. This may sound impossible, but the truth is that it is extremely simple. You know what rain is, right? Rain is little drops of water that fall from the clouds and make things wet. The next time it rains, go outside. Start turning in circles as you look up to the sky. Slowly begin spinning faster and faster as you extend your arms to maintain balance. You will soon begin to feel sick from spinning around so fast. It is at this point that you will open your mouth and allow partially digested food to be expelled. As the food travels through the air, specific particles will attach themselves to the rings. In less than two hours, you will be able to see the amazing rings very clearly in a slightly altered state.


Each of the rings you see is defined as one individual type of happy. A large blue ring means that happy is obtained through candy and metal objects. A thin yellow ring means that happy is generated by making others unhappy. A medium-sized purple ring means that happy is only there for about twenty seconds and then it is gone forever. A fat orange ring means that happy is eating way too much food all the time and then feeling angry because you are grossly overweight. A bumpy clear ring is a bunch of stuff that always gets in the way of everything for no apparent reason. And a thick crimson red ring points to the fact that happy can only truly be achieved through genuine stupidity. And it is this very last ring that means the most. In order to achieve happy, stupid must come first.


It may seem as if becoming stupid would be very difficult. But it is actually very, very easy. Most people are born with stupid, but they don't know how to nurture it. Others have stupid weaved all through themselves but they don't know how to tap into it. If you observe other people, you will immediately notice that they are all very stupid. You may ask yourself, "If that is the case, then why aren't all these people happy?"

That is a very good question and one that cannot easily be answered in several difficult ways. The stupid inside the average person is not just helpful stupid that creates happy. The basic stupid is untapped, and that makes it virtually worthless. A person can have wads and wads of basic stupid. But if that stupid is never modified or regulated, it will only make them more and more pathetic over time.


You may not realize it, but there is no way to make yourself less stupid. You can try for years and years by reading and learning all kinds of things. But in the end, you will still be extremely dumb. But don't feel depressed or sad, because--as usual--there are lots of ways of dealing with this. When you drive, you modify the speed of your vehicle. When you eat, you modify the food by chewing it and digesting it. When you walk, you modify where you are by using your legs to transport you from one place to another. If you can do all of these things, is there anything you can't do? If you can't answer this basic question, you may want to go back and restart.

Whenever you get lost in the process, no matter whether it is sooner or later, always remember that the most basic thing you can do is stare at yourself in a mirror and do what the ancient apes did with a large stick. This will always bring you back home, which is where you need to be in order to move forward. You need to move forward in order to be happy. So no matter how many times it takes, you will always need to go back home and restart all over again. It is only by repeating this process that you can begin to remove yourself from the cycle you are in.


When you repeat things, you become smart stupid. Smart stupid is defined as stupidity that is worse than regular stupidity. It can be refined or homogeneous, but it is always smart. When you feel stupid, you have the potential to become smart. And when you become smart, you automatically become stupid. It's the same as planets revolving around the sun. Gravity keeps the planets in place. Accordingly, smart stupid keeps you in the pasture with all the other smart stupid people. But what about happy? Hasn't it somehow gotten lost somewhere along the way?


Happy does get lost most of the time. It gets lost inside cans and passageways and it can even get lost in hampers and mouse holes. You've got to find that happy. Slap your horsey on it's backside with a cobblestone and gallop toward the thing you want. That crimson red ring gets brighter when you go faster on your horse. Ride 'em cowboy. Ride 'em like the wind ain't got nothin' to perpetuate. When you get off your horse, you may notice that your paws are distorted. But don't despair. Distorted paws are a sign that pure happiness is now within your reach. The distortion may get cleared away from time to time, but that ain't no big deal. Just put on your big cowboy hat and jump right up on that horsey thing again...because happiness may just be right around the corner.


The critical ring is red because it was created by your very own blood. When you bleed, you create happiness. So in order to become happy or to make others happy, you must be able to bleed freely. Now some of you may ask, "Do you really think I'm dumb enough to bleed all over the place so that I can see a bloody red ring that doesn't really exist in the first place?" The answer may be yes or no. You might not ever be smart enough to know the limits of your stupidity. And you may not ever be stupid enough to know the noticeable limits of invisible rings that you can only see when they are covered with partially digested food. Do you want to spin around in the rain again? Sure you do. When you spin around, you feel sick. And when you feel sick, you know what it is like to feel well. Feeling bad is the same as feeling wonderful. It all depends on your point of view.


Those stupid enough to believe in crappy things will find solace in the fact that there will always be plenty of usable material. Think about plants and animals. Think about technology. Think about history and everything that has happened. Think about all of the religions all over the world. Think about hats and topical ointments. Think about tar and aluminum. Think about wax and taxi parts. And then start thinking about belief. A strong belief in one thing leads to even stronger beliefs in other things. When you believe, your soul gets smarter and smaller. And if you believe long enough and hard enough, your soul will eventually disappear altogether and you won't even exist no more.


Right about now you may be feeling angry or that you have been manipulated in some way or another. You may be saying to yourself, "I am such a retard. All this time I've been hurting myself and doing all kinds of crazy things because I was foolish enough to believe that these things would make me happy!" But calm down, that is certainly not the case. Nothing could be further from the truth. You are now as you have always been.

Open your mind as the happy envelops you with waves of warm mellow. Allow it to combine and react with other things that are evolving inside of you. You don't never need to read no more now because you already got what you is. All you needed was to have some directions to follow and the ability to combine important things and follow instructions. In the end, the process has sent you right back to where you always was. And the achievement is now so resilient and precise...that it will follow you around blindly for the rest of your remaining mortal life.


©2019 LMNOP (aka dONW7)